One Night Stand Hookup Tips for Women over 40

Mature woman in one night standPersonally, I think every woman should have a one night stand. If done right, it can be very liberating. A woman will never feel used again, as she will grow confident in her sexuality, security and gain control over her sex life. However, us women will do things a little bit differently, no offense to the men, as there are some who are extremely respectful of one night stand situations, and act accordingly, but there are still many who do not, leaving women feeling used, alone and extremely hurt.  We will conduct our behavior with honesty, pride and self respect. One night stands do not have to be shameful when it’s between two mature adults, who mutually agree to enter into a night of fun and passionate adult fun. It can be safe, experimental, and possibly lead to a friendship, relationship, or nothing at all. As a woman, you may need to take the lead in this arrangement to ensure the night and morning progress smoothly and as planned. When guidelines and expectation are set proactively before the night begins, guards can be put down a bit, and the atmosphere can be more relaxed and enjoyed by both parties. Remember the old saying “Expect nothing and be pleasantly surprised”? Yes, now is the perfect time to use apply that philosophy.

If you have found yourself over 40 and single, it’s time to have some fun! Whether you’ve gotten divorced, been through several relationships, or chosen to remain single, one night stands may be a regular part of your life, or may happen just once. Whatever your case may be, give yourself permission to engage in this activity, be an adult and have fun. Sex and intimacy are a natural part of an adult life, and should be enjoyed to the fullest. Just because past history has deprived women of their sexuality, in 2017 that is not the case. Sex is more open, more casual, and one night stands are no longer frowned upon.

Here are some helpful tips to make the experience more satisfying:

The number one most important rule for a one night stand hookup!

Always, always be prepared with some sort of contraceptive protection. There are many types of birth control methods available for both women and men. And ladies, don’t rely on the men and assume they are responsible for this!  Yes, condoms are extremely convenient and safe, but you never know the mentality of the person you are engaging in intercourse with, as this is a “one night stand”, and most likely you haven’t gotten very much farther than knowing each other’s favorite color, if that.. What if the person you are about to sleep with is prone to getting so carried away that they forget to wrap it up! Take control.  The first rule of thumb for one night stands is to always wear protection. There are methods to control pregnancy, such as the pill, IUD, sponge, , diaphragm,the vaginal ring, patch or shot, but none of these are safe for STD’s. For that, a female or male condom is safest.

Halting foreplay for one moment to ensure protection methods are intact, is worth the safety from an STD or an unplanned pregnancy!

Odd as it may be, have the talk!

Tell him exactly what this will be and where you stand. This is where you as a woman can take charge of the situation, and quite possibly earn a great deal of respect.  Being that woman are usually more emotionally attached or prone to involving feelings, it is often liberating to be upfront about the upcoming nights events, and to communicate what you are looking for. A simple, light hearted, and joking “Hey, I’m not looking for anything serious, so don’t fall in love with me too quickly!” says it all. It really can give you the upper edge, and reverse the traditional roles one night stands usually play.

Watch the alcohol!

Although this is what often leads to the one night stand in general, it is not a safe environment in which to responsibly engage in sex with a stranger. A couple of glasses of wine to loosen up may be fine, but a sloppy drunk leads to irresponsibility in protection, and lack of proper consent. One must be clear minded to make a rational decision, and alcohol robs people of that option.


hot one-night standThe odds are not in your favor here. Scientifically speaking, less than 50% of women will orgasm on this night, basically due to our hard wiring for attaching love, and feelings to sex. Over time, you may beat the odds! But initially, you will need to relax, be open about what turns you on, and don’t be shy.

The exit strategy

The morning after the one night stand could be a bit awkward if you let it. Just don’t! If you end up at his place, it’s probably best to get up early, get ready, and head out the door before the oddness settles in. If you haven’t exchanged numbers, use this time to jot a little thank you note with that information, only if you would be interested in seeing them again. If not, pack it up, and head out! No strings attached. If you end up at your place, feel free to get up early and continue on with your morning rituals as if nothing was different. Offering coffee is an nice morning gesture to this person who you shared your bed with whether you’ll be seeing them again or not.  Offering to help find a taxi for him, or asking if he needs directions to get home, are gently ways to quicken the departure process.

Some last minute words of advice:

  • Never proceed with a one night stand hookupif your gut is telling you no, or stop. Trust your instinct for safety first.
  • If you have any suspicions about the birth control, Plan B or the morning pill should be used.
  • If after your first one night stand dating, you feel they aren’t for you, that’s ok also! It is definitely a mind frame that is not shared by all
  • Even if you went as far as being naked on the bed. No is no. If you decide against it last minute your decision is to be respected. You are under no obligation what so ever to continue in something that you are not 100% certain about.
  • But if you do decide to engage, relax, have fun and enjoy your life! As a woman, you are actually in your sexual prime! Take advantage of that, and learn to detach unless you meet someone you’re absolutely crazy about!

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