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TOP Funniest Failed One Night Stands

funny sexA one night stand can be a very exciting moment for most people and can sometimes be a nightmare when disasters strike, full of embarrassing blunders. This is when your random hookup goes from pleasure to mortification state. This is the moments that you’d rather try hard to forget or pray that this is only a dream.

 

Here are some most horrific tales about the funniest failed one-night stand that is embarrassing.

 

These tales will literally prepare you for future random hookup setbacks.

One lady reveals how her one night stand got embarrassing, she had forgotten to hide her vibrator and there it was at her bed side. This is her story:

Went out for a drink a couple blocks away, there I was sitting next to this really cute Guy and I really like him, he was very handsome. He walks towards me and orders me another drink. After a couple of drinks with him, he goes to the counter and request for a song. On the dance floor, he pounds me and we start making out for over 30 minutes or more. It was fascinating and really romantic. I decide to take it to my apartment. And this is where things went really ballistic.

Was very drunk and had no clue that my bedroom was a mess. His hands were all over me. I reached for my bedroom door and as I switch on the light, I was embarrassed….. The vibrator was right there, I figured maybe he didn’t see it but  I wasn’t sure. He just dropped me off and walked away, and all he said was that he had an emergency. I was so embarrassed and can’t get that out of my mind.

Here is another story:

My new girl and I were on a date, we skipped the date and jump to my house. She was happy to reciprocate when I went down on her. Within a minute or so she rams three fingers up my ass. I jump away so fast that I just taped out and shouted. It was rather painful, I felt an immediate stinging stir that came with a warm feeling. I actually thought that I had pooped myself.

I leaped up and turned the lights on to realize blood was everywhere. My legs were covered with blood and her hand was covered with blood. I asked her why she did that and her responded:  “My ex-boyfriend loved it”.

Clearly, I was traumatized and ended up in the hospital.

Here is another crazy story:

A girl hooks up with a random guy and Ooops …! He falls asleep mid-way before doing it.

“It’s not that the guy was boring in bed”, she said. We had hooked up in a bar and thing went rather tense and we jump to his place. He was romantic and erotic that I felt he was going to tear me up.

Carried me to his bed. Got his pants off and we were about to do it. He just stopped moving suddenly and I thought maybe he just passed out. Turned him over and discovered he had dozed off.

Couldn’t believe it. Maybe he was so drunk or may be too tired to do it, I couldn’t understand.

A one-night stand goes rogue after forgetting to carry a pack of condoms.

Nobody thought it was going to go this far. You meet a random girl, she likes you, you like her, and suddenly you both want to wrap things up.

You anxiously jump to your place and when you guys are about to start making out. She asks you whether you are packed. Funny enough you forgot to buy the condoms and things get weird, and everyone gets confused. You jump to your roommate’s locker, UGH! Nothing. Well, you pick up your pants, and the hook up is officially over, what a disappointment.

Here’s a messy hook up story:

A girl goes out to have fun in a club. She enjoys it, then all of a sudden she sees a guy she likes. They get drunk and he decided to take her to his place to wrap things up.

They get to his place and he opens the door, when he turned on the lights, his place is messy and filled with filth. She is turned off by the filth in that guy’s place. She calls it off and drives home. The guy is left stranded and really embarrassed.

Another story that involves the parents:

One dude goes out with his friends for a drink. The dude lives with his parents but is away on vacation so he is ready for some fun.

After a couple of drinks, he spots a beautiful girl and gets her a drink. They get acquitted and he decides to take her to his place.

He gets there and discovers the lights from his home. They head straight to the door as he tries to open it, his mom unlocks the door from the inside and opens it wide. She welcomes them to the living room. The two are very confused and embarrassed.

A heads up could have saved the situation, but they just happened to have cut their vacation short.

Here’s a story that involves the boyfriend:

failed one night standshe was a total stranger sobbing alone in the far end of the bar. The guy goes to her and asks what was wrong.

She suddenly hugs him and takes him to the dance floor where they danced and begun to make out for almost 30 minutes.

They decided to go to her hotel room to wrap things up. They were mid-way there when he heard the door open and he sees five people (her boyfriend and four of his friends) walking in it around 2 am.

The boyfriend snapped and was furious while his friend held him back. The guy immediately got off the girl and told the boyfriend that he had absolutely no idea, and ran out with his pants on his shoulder.

He experiences a really embarrassing and traumatizing moment.

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